Single-parent family is one of the phenomena in this day and age. This phenomenon is noted to have increased from 13% in 1970 to 26% in 1984.
According to these data, it is estimated that 1 in 5 children in America experiences part of their childhood in single-parent families. Since 1990, more than 50% of children born today will spend part of their childhood in single-parent families.
The first written description of a single-parent family and somewhat grim is in Genesis. It expelled Hagar and Ishmael from Abraham’s house because of Sarah’s jealousy. Ismail grew up as “a savage whose hand is against everyone and everyone’s hand is against him.”
Today single-parent families have a special set of problems. This is because there is only one parent who raises the child.
There may be fewer positive traits in a single-parent family when measured in numbers than in a full-parent family.
This single parent becomes more important for the child and his development because this single parent does not have a partner to support each other.
There is a kind of worry in single-parent families where the parents have to work and raise their children simultaneously.
A single parent must meet the needs for love and finances, play the role of father and mother simultaneously, and control anger or depression experienced by both his child and himself.
Such parents experience problems because they are socially isolated from their still complete parents (in pairs). This makes the task of being a single parent even more difficult.
Single-parent family as a mother
A mother may become a single parent perhaps due to the death of her husband or a divorce, and some mothers never remarry, including those who choose to be single mothers.
Nowadays, divorce is becoming a common way to become a single parent. Divorced mothers have more difficulty in power and discipline issues.
Several mothers explained the difficulty of carrying out this task. These mothers may be forced to work outside the home for the first time to meet their family’s financial needs with a meager first salary.
Some can no longer depend on their ex-husband’s financial and emotional needs. We know that less than 50% of fathers are willing to pay for their children’s living expenses after divorce.
One additional change is taking place today: mothers who have been widowed, divorced or abandoned by their husbands usually return to their parent’s homes.
Currently, the spirit of independence makes them want to do everything alone. There is ample evidence to suggest that children do better if they live in a home with at least two adults, regardless of whether the other adult is a grandmother, older sibling, spouse (now husband), or even a female friend of her mother.
Single-parent family as a father
Men who are single parents may be very unfamiliar with housework. But thanks to modern household appliances, they can learn more quickly to do tasks that women usually do. Often fathers who are single parents say that housework is easy and not that important. Household appliances are easy to use. On the other hand, many women struggle to repair plumbing or install signage. For no manuals, these tasks had to be done in a way that most women had never learned.
Divorced mothers are often overburdened with no money to enjoy life and unable to think for themselves because too many thoughts are devoted to their children. No wonder they end up getting depressed!
What to do as a family with one parent
If you are a single parent, it is recommended that you explore new options, including friends or a professional counselor in your own life.
Look for activities for your child that involve other children and people who can support you and your child.
Look for a figure who can take the place of one of the currently missing parents for your child and arrange a time to visit a complete family so your child can see what a family is really like.
Join a single parent association/club to get support from friends going through the same thing as you and tips on being a single parent. Join in activities at church and school.
Remember that many single parents in our environment today, so many associations with various purposes, such as a mountaineering club or church choir, always involve single parents.
It is also recommended to keep a diary to clear your mind and progress. That way, your needs can also be taken care of so that you can be healthy enough to take on your parenting role and consider living with other people and living for a while with other single parents.
This way, you not only think about money, sources of income, and childcare duties, but you can also avoid the possibility of being trapped as a lonely mother in the house you rent.
Since isolation can be your biggest problem, rest assured that creating a bigger family through sharing is the right answer for single parents.
Families with fathers as single parents start their lives, perhaps due to changes in lifestyle and roles.
Fathers wish to continue their duties as parents after divorce when they know they can also function as single parents and become the biggest source of economy.
More than one million children are raised alone by their fathers, a 65% increase since 1970.
In single-parent households, children’s roles change, and they have a greater sense of responsibility and decision-making ability. The “family” itself has also changed.
There is no single parenting after divorce, and there is a network of relationships between neighbors, new partners, church friends, therapists, single parent groups, etc.